A Dream Comes True

"SINGER” was the ONLY answer to a question people asked me, “What do you want to be in the future?” when I was so young that I can’t remember what age I was back then. Instead of getting praise and support, I was let down. There’s one thing called norm that I needed to conform, so I just kept the dream of becoming a singer to myself, never had confidence to post any videos of me singing on social networks because I was constantly teased that my voice sucked. I believed in what people said but my heart. Tired and stressed with this unstoppably demanding world, I decided to get out of my comfort zone to do what I love to do—writing song and singing—despite knowing nothing about music. And here I am today, a singer-songwriter at Songkites, a community of original artists.

First, I would love to take this opportunity to wholeheartedly thanks Carrie Herbert, Euan Gray and Bong Soria Oung for believing in me from the very beginning and letting me into the community of talents. Thanks for the mentorship, patience, motivation, inspiration and trust. Up until now, I still can’t believe that I’ve come into this path. I keep asking myself who I am, why I should be one among these very talented artists, what good I have done to receive such a privilege. Second, thanks to Ting Tong, Sophia Kao, Marie Thach, Sam TheUnbreakable, Felix Séa Banh Zung NevaEnufer, Brooklyn Jc, and Bong Sai Bt for being good friends, being supportive and giving your honest advice for nothing but my own good. I really don’t know the right words to express how grateful I am to each and every one of you in Songkites right now. Just know that I’m forever thankful. Third, thanks the musicians who helped play the instruments very beautifully, APSARA MERA PRODUCTION crew for helping run the concert very professionally and smoothly, Kate Korpi Salon for making me fabulous on stage, other media teams who shot great photos of me, and the rests who were involved in the concert. Most importanly, thanks my family, relatives, best friends, friends, fans and everyone for your undying supports whether by coming to cheer me in the concert or sending me love on Facebook and Instagram. You’re the reason that I held my head up high when performing.

Talking about my performance, I know I lack a lot as an artist, but I would humbly ask you guys to give me time to improve. I promise I will work harder to be a better version of myself as a songwriter, singer and performer. And again, thanks for your cheers even not knowing who I was back then. A new artist has just been born, so please keep an eye on me and be part of my journey to make more original music for Cambodia <3

Photos by Ah Sva Media and Nataly Lee

  

We blame but...

We blame the government for failing to protect forests, but we’re eager to buy wooden furniture made from luxurious timbers that environmentalists deem rare. We blame the government for failing to preserve wild animals, but we illegally buy their products, we cook them and we eat them. We blame the government for not keeping the country clean, but we litter wherever we go, we spit on the streets and we’re too lazy and embarrassed to pick garbage in the public. We blame the government for not protecting the environment, but we don’t live our lives as environmental friendly as we can. We blame the government for freeing illegal immigrants coming to steal our jobs, but we don’t want to improve ourselves in order to compete with them. We blame the government for not tackling traffic issues, but we never bother following the traffic law. We blame the government for not banning alcohol ads on TVs or radios, but we thirst it more than than anyone in the world does. We don't just drink but we bathe in the alcohol. We blame the government for being corrupt, but we bribe whoever the hell is for our own benefits. We blame the government for abusing human rights, but we treat those inferior to us as if they were less human than we are. We blame the government for favoring billionaires but neglecting the poor, but we’re the ones that idolize those capitalist pricks as our gods and rip the poor off. And the list goes on.

Yes, the government should take all the blames, considering what they have done and have failed to do. But what have you done for your country then? Do you think you have the quality to blame given that you’re also part of the problems? Get your facts straight and change yourself first before you open your mouth and hide behind your computer screen, criticizing the government. 

Khmer Traditional Dance

We are so into modern pop culture that we know every single name of the artists. We spend times following their news and money buying their music. Those artists receive all the credit they need that lead them into commercial success, but not everyone is talented. With the good looks, a little bit of the talent, media play and right marketing, they can draw lots of people to be their fans. Very unfortunately, such a case doesn’t happen to these traditional artists. Born with raw talent and passion, they’ve struggled for years in practicing and performing but don’t get enough credit they deserve. They are very underrated, underpaid and unrecognized.

Learn from them and listen to their stories. You’ll be moved and thankful for their dedication in preserving and preaching our culture. They’re the living heritage, and they need your love, respect and appreciation.

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL

I was constantly teased for having dark brown skin, little and curly hair, alien face and small body frame, which is regarded as not good-looking or worse, ugly in Cambodian society. As a person who is visually oriented, it’s a lie to say I wasn’t sad about this. Nope, I was very very sad. I gradually developed a sense of insecurity and shame about my look, and always thought of changing myself through whatever means possible, including plastic surgery in order to make me look like a Korean or Hollywood actor in the movies I used to watch. Not until one day, I was seeing myself in the mirror and pretending a smile like other self-absorbed people would do, and I took one step closer to see more clearly. Then, I looked right into my eye, and miracle happened. I saw a dark circle composed of complex iris and pupil in my eye and was very stunned by its beauty. It’s finely-crafted and more glamorous than every single priceless diamond, emerald, ruby or sapphire I ever saw in the pictures or in a flesh. How could an ugly person be attached with such a divine jewel in both eyes? That's when I realized that I wasn’t ugly. I started to see myself differently and to be proud and appreciative of my skin, my hair, my face and my body. There’s no need to change since I AM ALREADY HANDSOME. There’s no more sadness, insecurity or shame. I’m not emotionally affected by people’s words anymore.

You can’t change the way people look at you since “beauty is in the eye of the beholder,” but you can change the way you see and feel about yourself. You don’t have to have the handsome or beautiful face like Zac Efron or Angelina Jolie, or hot body like Bradley Cooper or Victoria Secret models to be good-looking. All you need is a heart to be thankful for who you are because you are created to be the best version of yourself. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!!!

Angkor Sangkranta 2015

You probably have seen or heard about “Cambodia Kingdom of Wonder” on CNN TV commercial, YouTube or multiple travel websites on the Internet. It is a promotional campaign used to preach about tourism potentials in this country. Cambodia does not have complex high-end subways, jungles of skyscrapers or giant shopping malls that other developed countries have, but the richness in our culture, the long history of tradition, our friendliest people, thousands of ancient temples, most beautiful bays and islands and the amazon-like forests are what make Cambodia a wonderfully unique Kingdom.  As a Cambodian, I cannot be proud enough to be born in such a beautiful country despite the fact that I used to feel self-pity for being a Cambodian myself. Not until I have chances to explore Cambodia through family trips, trips with friends, volunteer programmes, youth camps and stuff, I cannot help but fall in love with my country and my people even more deeply. Earlier this year in April, I had chance to volunteer in Angkor Sangkranta 2015, the celebration of Khmer New Year in Siem Reap Angkor, the most visited place in Cambodia. There were a lot of sub-programmes in this three-day festival, namely, ritual offerings, latten floating, star-studded concert, Guinness-World-Record-breaking Madison Dance, Khmer traditional games and many more. My role was to facilitate in Khmer traditional games—Kleng Chhab Kon Mon—in front of Angkor Wat Temple, the UNESCO World Heritage Site. The game was about an eagle trying to catch chickens. A group of about five to ten people queuing and holding each other’s waist with a person in the front as a mother chicken trying to protect her children from being caught by the eagle played by the other person. The game is quite physically challenging, but it’s worth playing since it brings about team spirit and leadership skills. Not only did I facilitate in the game, but I also enjoyed wandering around to see other festivities. There were cultural exhibitions organized by youths from ten ASEAN countries and other parts of the world, which helped me to meet my good friend from Brunei. We first met in Malaysia in ASEAN Youth Volunteer Programme. That makes me realize how small this world is and how well connected we are as ASEAN community. Aside from the exhibition, I went to the Fantasy Village, where lives during Angkor Empire were astonishingly displayed by the small clay puppests of ancient Khmer people doing their day-to-day activities. There were a lot more to see and do during the event but I was not able to. Out of those activities, what captured my soul the most was Cambodian traditional dance since I was so into dancing. Everyone was welcomed to join and got lost in the excitement from the loud music. We danced; we played; we celebrated our New Year as one big family full of loving brothers and sisters. Three days of work ended with just a blink of an eye. It did not seem to me as work but a busy holiday, which made me a little exhausted but overjoyed with the unforced smiles on the faces of thousand people I saw. It was the platform where friendships were made among my fellow volunteers, where I was inspired by open-hearted people I encountered with and where my volunteerism spirit was valued. Mission accomplished!!!

Controversial Gates in Angkor Sangkranta, Siem Reap

Regarding the controversial Angkor Sankranta gates, admittedly, they look Vietnamese-or-Chinese-temple-inspired, which are different from our traditional styles, causing the uproar among Cambodians since politically, we're not so fond of the twos. But I don't think it's something to do with politics.

The design team might have thought of building the exciting vibe or catching people's attention in this upcoming Khmer New Year because Yellow and Red work best in contrasting the gates from the shadowy and peaceful surroundings in Siem Reap Angkor. It's good that Cambodians are sensitive with the influence of other cultures on ours but it's not OK to irrationally generalize whatever happens in this Kingdom is politically-driven, label others with different stance from ours traitors, or bash other nations by using whatever worst words existing in our language. It's not the gates that bring our culture down but we ourselves. Our words have proved the worlds that we're not civilized.

The concept of the event is all about celebrating Khmer culture and tradition in Siem Reap Angkor, the world heritage site, so it would be a foolish idea if anyone tried to blend ours with Vietnamese's or Chinese's, knowing that the public would be on fire. As a volunteer myself, I'm repeatedly told to be serious about presenting my Khmer identity in this event. My duty is to facilitate in Khmer popular games, and I have to practice with my fellow volunteers under the supervision of lecturers and professors from the Royal University of Fine Art every single weekend to make sure that games we're going to facilitate are traditionally played.

Not just that, although all volunteers already know how to sing national anthem and historical song, we need to dedicate half of every training time on rehearsing them, which makes me feel so BORED, and all of us, 3000 volunteers, will be given two sets of Khmer traditional clothes, not to mention a lot of things that have been done. Isn't it nonsensical that the organizers intentionally want the gates to be inspired by Vietnamese and Chinese structure after putting so much effort in promoting the originality of Khmer culture and tradition in this event?

Give yourselves times for a second thought before you let your fingers do the thinking!!!

Photo Credit: Mai YU (Facebook)

The LO for Azerbaijan Delegation? Challenge Accepted

Assigned to be an LO (Liaison Officer) for Azerbaijan Delegation in UNWTO/UNESCO World Conference on Tourism and Culture hosted by Cambodian Government, specifically by Ministry of Toursim, I was quite blank since never had I known this country before, leading me to a mixture of a little disappointment and excitement. Shortly after this, I googled Azerbaijan up and found out some basic information but got no time to search for details because I was jammed with deadlines at my workplace and freelance work at that time, and most of the sites I searched were in Azerbaijan or Turkish itself, I’m not sure, which I couldn’t understand even a word.

Prior to the event, there were a few trainings for LOs to help us be ready for the hospitality for delegations’ stay in Siem Reap, Cambodia. It was so serious that got me nervous for just thinking of the stuff I was supposed to take lead. Arranging motorcade and VIP car together with SO (Security Officer) to mobilize delegates from Siem Reap International Airport to the hotel and vice versa, facilitating the delegates to pay a courtesy call to Prime Minister of Cambodia, assisting them during the gala dinner with the King of Cambodia, and many more were alien to me. But this wasn’t nerve-wrecking as the thought of working directly for the Deputy Minister of Culture and Tourism of Azerbaijan for five days.  My heart beat so fast when thinking of this. It was seriously worrisome  since I was so afraid of having flaws, which could easily displease the delegates. All I could do was prepare and prepare.

On the 2^nd of Febuary, it came to welcoming my delegates at the airport. They looked so cold that I wasn’t even able to do self-introduction properly because of nervousness. There were two of them, one was Mr. Nazim Samadov, Deputy Minister of Culture and Tourism, and the other was Ramil Abbakirov, his assistant. My first impression was they were tough that needed me to remain professional and distanced as much as possible. I with people from Ministry of Tourism managed to get everything done for the check-in at the airport and the hotel but with some difficulties at the immigration office. First mission was turned down, and many more were coming tensely. The second day came, and it’s day I realized that they are really nice, easy-going and so down-to-earth after accompanying them to shopping at Old Market, pre-conference tour at Tonle Sap Lake and dinner at Pub Street. I was allowed to sit with them and had a talk on different topics. Since then, the barrier between us was demolished, and I started to feel close to them without being nervous anymore. Because of this, I was even more motivated to give all I had as an LO of Azerbaijan Delegation.

The third day which was the 4^th of February was the toughest day. I was told by my team leader to be super serious regarding the courtesy call on Prime Minister of Cambodia by heads of delegations at Le Meredian Angkor Hotel. Again, this mission was successfully done with the chance to see my Prime Minister in real life for the very first time. In the evening, there came the biggest challenge of the conference, which was “Gala Dinner” with the King of Cambodia at the Elephant Terrace, 15-mins drive from the hotel my delegates stayed. Since every delegate was expected to join the motorcade with others to the venue at the same time, all LOs and responsible parties like VIP car drivers, SOs, protocol people and Ministry of Tourism of Cambodia were closely working together to make sure that all heads of delegations would be driven to the venue on time and safely. If not, LOs were the only person to receive all the blames. One of the matters that could possibly turn the process into a disaster was delegates’ lateness. Blessed enough, my delegates are the most punctual of all. While other LOs kept complaining about their delegates being late, I felt really sorry for mine for having to wait for others all the time during the conference since they were always on time. Finally, my delegates were brought to the venue and led to their seats together with the King and other delegates from all around the world to enjoy the dinner and Cambodian cultural performances, and it was another first time that I saw the King in real life.

Courtesy call and gala dinner had already passed, and the thought of indulging myself with a simple rest just came to me, but it didn't go as wished. Another big assignment was just thrown at me. It was a number of bilateral meetings with ministers from different countries that my delegates proposed. Never had I thought of being responsible for this task. Honestly, it sounded like the wall I couldn't climb because I’m not a kind who is up to challenge, but for that time, I needed to be even if I didn't want to. Arranging the bilateral meeting between minister and minister? Isn't it something that only protocol or international-affair officers can do? Thankfully, with the fullest support and cooperation from the secretariat and my fellow LOs responsible for ministers my delegates proposed to meet, several bilateral meetings with the Secretary General of UNWTO and the heads of delegations from Mexico, Republic of Korea, Seychelles and India, and small meetings with Minster of Culture and Minster of Tourism of Cambodia were smoothly arranged. OMG!!! The impossible things just happened to me.

With just a blink of an eye, the last day already came, so I was determined to get my delegates enjoy every single bit of the visit in Siem Reap Angkor. According to the plan, they were supposed to join the post-conference tour with other delegates, but because of the miscommunication with the travel agency responsible for arranging the tour and the lateness of other delegates’, we together with Lithuanian delegates decided to go for the tour on our own because I so hated to keep them wait any longer. Like planned, the whole day of temple tour was well spent. I was so humbly happy to be able to bring them to Bonteay Srey, Ta Prum, Angkor Wat and Bayon Temple, the Elephant Ride at Angkor Thom gate and finally another shopping for the spirit in the city center. It’s something that I couldn't be proud more when seeing the delegates interested in our temples.

The whole day of temple tour had gone; it was time they needed to leave Cambodia for Azerbaijan. Their flight was at 00:10 am, and I needed to stick with them until they were on board. Ironically, I told myself my mission was accomplished, but no. A big problem happened that almost got me burst out crying. Their flight was scheduled to transit in Beijing for 24 hours, so they would need the luggage for the personal use, but the airline company just sent them directly to Azerbaijan even with many notices from me and Ramil, telling they would transit in Beijing for 24 hours. To me, it was the darkest moment ever for being an LO. How could the worst thing happen at the last moment? However, with a very intense negotiation with the airline company, everything was settled, making me feel like being born again. I was assigned to send them off till boarding, initially, but was told by a person from Ministry of Tourism to leave the airport shortly after we were done sorting out the problem. No choice, I had to say good bye to them, leaving me traumatized by separation anxiety.

It was one of the greatest experiences I ever had. With the honor to work closely with very down-to-earth Deputy Minister of Culture and Tourism and his assistant from a far country I never knew. I got chance to learn new things and experience doing tasks I thought I was so limited to. I couldn’t be grateful enough for my team leaders from Council of Ministers for the great leadership, the organizing committee for the very well-organized conference, SOs, drivers  and my fellow LOs for their undying support and cooperation, and most importantly, my Azerbaijan delegates for accepting me as their LO and teaching me how worthy my volunteer work is. Mission accomplished!!!