Overcome Who I was

I used to ask myself “would it be great if I had chance to be on stage debating in front of many people?” But when thinking of how challenging it is to deliver my speech and to rebut my opponents’ ideas made my heart beat so fast. It’s ok to do it in my comfort zone, but out of it would be the misery. However, on May 11, 2013 I did something that I hadn’t expected myself to be able to do, which is debating publicly.

Actually, I was informed the debate motion about one week beforehand, but because I was so busy with loads of assignments, homework, and tests, I let it untouched until only two days before the debate came. I should also blame myself of poor time management, because if I hadn’t spent too much time on Facebook and TV, I would have had some time to do researches on the motion. Within two days, I was so much under pressure when reading so many articles, thinking of what arguments should I use to strengthen my stance, and rehearsing again and again. Finally, I got it done right on the day of debate around 1 am. Oh My Goodness!!! It was completely what we call procrastination. I was not yet prepared. How could I be on stage? I was super nervous. I could do nothing but pray to God to give me wisdom and courage to do such a big task in my life. I didn’t ask Him to help me win in the debate but overcome me myself who used to be shy and always got the cold feet whenever I spoke in public. When the hour of the debate came, I felt like I was in the most terrifying nightmare ever. After one of my team mate and my opponent had done their job as the first speaker, here came my turn to be on stage as the second speaker. Can you believe it? All of the nervousness and shyness didn’t show up on me. I felt so natural in debating although I had a few hiccups sometimes, but it’s because of my limited English knowledge and the understanding of the motion itself. Obviously, my opposition side did a better job than we, but I didn’t get hurt at all because I knew from the start that our group wouldn’t defeat them as they were all so great in terms of fluency in English and debating skills. But we were not that bad too. We did our best in this debate with the scene of responsibility and unity.

In short, our group didn’t win in this debate but I learned so many things from it. God’s will is to make me know more about myself that I’m not qualified to be a good debater or English speaker yet. So I need to pull my socks up if I don’t want to look foolish because of thousand grammar mistakes and wrong word choice in front of people. Thank God for this great experience J